10 by 30 – The Good Life

My first 30 years have been amazing, but the good life is just beginning.  I’ve had some years of building and transition, but this year has been better than I ever imagined.  I did not have a 30 by 30 list of goals, but even if I did, I would have had much lower expectations.  Lucky for me, that’s right in line with my favorite scripture, Ephesians 3:20.  I often recite the affirmations below and I truly recognize Favor aint Fair!

30by30_jls

www.facebook.com/q88photography

  1. I finished my first MBA semester with a 4.0 and debt free at the perfect school.
  2. I lead women in worship and ministry.
  3. I have my dream job as a Senior Quality Engineer, and an office (haaay).
  4. I was gifted affordable housing in America’s Finest City.
  5. I have a boyfriend that shows love more than he says it.
  6. I stopped my daily allergy medicine and weekly chiropractic care for scoliosis.
  7. I have a healthy family, pup, and Thee best of friends.
  8. I am an entrepreneur that successfully launched the LLC’s first Soiree.
  9. I am a Six Sigma Black Belt.
  10. I donate, tithe, and seek ways to be giving to others.

The last time I wrote about happiness was 5 years ago before going into 25, and little did I know there was so much room for growth.  It hasn’t always been easy, and there were plenty of time conflicts, delays, and burdens along the way.  It is my prayer that the coming years are even better, with more sleep & less stress!

This is 30!

This is 30!

Theme of the Month: Adulting

adulting

10 Tips to Nail this thing called ‘Adulting’

  1. Do a solo vacation more than 2 hours from any associate.
  2. Ask a friend to name one area where you can improve communication, and do it.
  3. Acknowledge and financially recognize assistance.
  4. Honor Your Commitments, but communicate to reschedule if necessary.
  5. Choose Priority 1 commitments over pleasure, even if you have put down money.
  6. Read a book cover to cover, soon – articles, magazines, and this blog don’t count.
  7. Alter your priorities to follow your Budget, which I know you’ve created.
  8. Delay gratification and sacrifice something for 30 days.
  9. Set a time limit for television, and do something productive each day.
  10. Exercise empathy and attempt to remedy others’ hurt.

How do you do ALL that you do?


This is my visual response to people who asks me this question including the end.

Quick rundown of the things I have going on right now:

  • Full-time Turbine Test Engineering Career
  • S.T.E.A.M. Education business owner and entrepreneur
  • Women’s Church Ministry Leader Ages 18-35
  • Middle school girls robotics coach
  • Applying to M.B.A. programs (and GMAT Prep)
  • Meetup Social group organizer
  • Planning our first family reunion
  • Liturgical dancer
  • Styling my hair
  • Traveling Often
  • Dating for Marriage
  • Artsy fun with painting and theater
  • Re-gaining beach body fitness
  • 20s Living with my girls

ILookLikeAnEngineer

Starting this summer, I’m actively going to do better with free time.  I will be on travel most of July, so that will help me transition quite nicely.  One major time management and stress reduction technique that I use is to make a checklist everyday.  I list 2 things that I want to complete for work, and 2 things that I want to complete outside of work.  For major things that may roll over, I list them at the top of my planner page as 2 goals for the week.  Also, I can only commit to one after-work event per day, reserving one weekday as a chill day at home.

For lifestyle items, I cook 1-2 meals per week with leftovers, I clean 1-2 load of laundry per weekend start to finish, and I clean one area of my place (bathroom, bedroom/linen, living area, dining area) every Sunday.

RelaxingSundays

I seem to manage everything pretty good, but I know stress is on the horizon when I double-book events on the same day, don’t wash any laundry that week, stop exercising/ dancing, or stop writing.  These are my warning signs before the physical ailments of sleep-deprivation, vocal cord dysfunction, or a sinus infection.

Pray for me yall!  While I love being busy, it’s not good for my health, and I’ve learned that it distracts me from my purpose.  We are all here “just enough time to do God’s Will”.  I never want to be too over-worked and over-stressed to be winning at this thing called life.

Why do I love cuffing season?

Let me count the ways…

  1. You actually deeply desire to take me on dates so
  2. for the first time, you love me for exactly who I am.
  3. To sway the cuffs, you take me to $50+ meals
  4. but never take the time to learn that $1 hot dogs are my favorite!
  5. You give purpose to that 2 month gap after wedding season
  6. and baby’s first days, weeks, hours of school caught on camera.
  7. I still have free rein to be nakie for Halloween
  8. and we don’t even need to discuss Thanksgiving or Christmas.
  9. At max, we agree to be exclusive,
  10. but that in no way obligates commitment.

    Photocreds: theshopblog.net

    Photocreds: theshopblog.net

  11. I’ll continue to answer your calls and texts while
  12. remembering that for the past 3 seasons you never called.
  13. I promise to invest in a portable charger
  14. and a portable battery for the portable charger.
  15. You don’t have to prove your ambitions or net worth
  16. since we won’t even make it to tax returns.
  17. I won’t dare ask if you’re married because even if you are,
  18. you’ll say you’re getting divorced – like that’s okay.
  19. All in all, cuffing season, you’re good-bad and ugly
  20. but your best clients are good-bad and Fine!

~Bonjour~

What it be like? Summer’13

Boy, how the summer has flown by.  Some new things, some old thangs.

werk

1. I moved into a new apartment!  I love it even more than my first one.  It’s a 2 bedroom… any visitors?!

2. I’ve passed the 1 year mark of living in San Diego.  Now all of the things are repeating themselves from when I first moved here.  Such as: FOOTBALL, church anniversary, pumpkin spice latte.

3. I’ve been to over 5 doctors in the past couple of months.  Ever since I had the flu in January, there have been a couple lingering things.  Nothing contagious, finished antibiotics, just some pain and stuff going on a daily basis.

4. I did a org-purge.  Like just went cold turkey on all of my organizations I was in.  God is still working with me on over-commitments.

5. Dating a Navy Man!  I’m learning something new everyday, which is awesome.

6. Had a 1 year luncheon with my team and my performance appraisal with my boss, both went great.  I still love my job!  And they love me, about 15 people came to my lunch 🙂

1 year luncheon

7.  I’ve gone to the beach a lot less, but been going to the pool a lot more due to pool parties and summer activities.

8.  I am getting so bored with my hair and decided to loc it up during the first part of next year.

9. I’ve done the 5K’s that I mentioned in the Spring’13 post.  I have at least 2 more to do this year.  I think this will just be a 5K year.  Maybe next year for the 10K and dare I say half marathon?!

10. I am on the cover of a book!! Beat that.

Two Way Mirrors by Just Jewel

That’s my life updates for those who care and I just haven’t spoken to in a while.  Also, it’s there for those don’t care… cuz you read to the bottom, so actually you do care!  Smooches.

Does Happiness End?

Right now, I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time!  I’ve been having a steady string of favor and blessings that have come my way.

Work:  I was worried for a little while because some of my team members have been going out of their way to sabatoge my progress.  Not explicitly telling my manager of the situation, I simply stated that I need to focus my knowledge and experience on another program.  Last week, we planned an exit strategy from that project and directing me towards my official engineering assignments!

Church:  I am really loving my church and my pastor.  He recently celebrated his 15 Pastoral Anniversary and it has been such a blessing to see what he has done with families, ministry, and the community.  The way that I got involved with the church was through their tutoring ministry, T.O.Y.S (Tutoring Our Youth for Success).  Since joining in December, I’ve been a lot more involved with Bible Study, meeting more members, and even sang in the Women’s Choir for Mother’s Day!

NSBE:  I’m officially the Programs Chair on the Region 4 Alumni Executive Board for the National Society of Black Engineers!  I am the lead of the Programs Zone.  My Program focus will be mainly on NSBEpreneur, Chapter Development, and Leadership and Personal Development.  My Personal focus will be on unemployed Alumni support.  I have a personal interest in that area and want to create an want the Alumni to serve as support for those going through recent graduation, layoffs, or entrepreneurship.

Toastmasters:  I am really enjoying my local chapter at work.  Toastmasters is a speaking organization to improve communication and leadership development.  I am still pursuing my first certification for Competent Communication, but I was asked to be on the leadership board as the Vice President Education.  It is the second highest ranking officer in the club, where my purpose is to get others excited and involved in the club.  Personally, the best way to do that is by illustrating what made me come to my first meeting and stay!

Relationships:  I’m finally out of an incredibly hurtful situation, and taking it slow towards the future.  If nothing else, that gives me something to shout about everyday!  I am very happy with my current situation.  I believe that I have already experienced many of the characteristics that I like (and don’t like).  The #1 must have is someone with a compatible personality – someone to rejoice in my happy times, and cheer me up when I’m feeling low.  The #1 dislike is trying to convince someone else that your plan is correct with no room to compromise or have a friendly debate.

Everything is on the up-and-up and I’m really enjoying my life right now.  BUT for every action, there is an equal and OPPOSITE reaction, which I am not excited about (Thanks Ike).

I’m not single, again

Okay, okay.  There has been a little confusion and lots of questions about the first line of this blog [I’m single again, doosh.] compared to my recent ones.  I was never really single.  Corbin and I did need to take a little break away from each other to figure out a couple things.  We really worked on not bringing negative things from our past into our present relationship.  I never stopped thinking about him and read numerous sites trying to deal with it.  However, it never quite felt like a break up.  My favorite site (and the guiding tool for life) is Wikihow where I looked up How to Get Over a Break Up.

I tried all of these tips on different levels, but I wasn’t happy. I did a really good job with 3. Keep your space and 6. Talk to your friends.  I talked to friends that were angry, friends that were concerned, friends that liked him, and friends that just listened.  Many things have changed since those convos and I trust that I have made a great decision.  Now comes when I need friends to support.  I am happier than I have ever been and excited for the new life to come!

Octoberfest

I had a date weekend with the boo!  We’re still long distance and instead of driving the 4 hours, we sometimes meet in the middle.  We’ve met in Fort Wayne, IN twice, but this time it was a city equally as ‘unique’, Dayton, OH.  It was a 2 hour drive for me.  I recommend it to anyone in a semi-long distance relationship and we highly recommend Priceline for hotels under $50 a night.  We’ve had the best luck with 3 1/2 star rooms.  The only difference between 3 and 3 1/2 is a flat-screen tv.  I don’t like to spend much time in a hotel room when I visit a new city so I really don’t need anything spectacular.

The first night we got in and visited downtown Dayton for dinner at The Spaghetti Warehouse.  We won’t be back there to eat.  The best things about the place were the decorations and the train that had dining tables.  The complimentary bread was bland, and the spaghetti AND meatballs weren’t seasoned at all.  I had the lasagna and it was just a step above the spaghetti (bland.3).  It really seemed like it was a local favorite though because there were a couple of large birthday parties while we were there.  We also ate at The Waffle House (personal fav) and Chick-CanDoNoWrong-Fil-A.

We went to the movie theater Friday and Saturday to see Hereafter and Paranormal Activity 2.  Hereafter was aight.  I wasn’t a big fan of the ending, and the previews gave away a little too much information.  It basically tells the entire plot and nothing in the movie really surprised me, so don’t watch the trailer… unless you don’t want to watch the movie.  I really liked Paranormal Activity 2.  I’m a huge fan of sequels especially when they connect in a great way to the original.  The movie definitely connected to the original in a way that no one expected!  Corbin hasn’t seen the original so I did have to fill him in on a couple details.

The other highlight of the weekend was the Majestic Nursery & Garden Corn Maze.  It took us about 30 minutes to get there, but it was well worth it.  It really gave us time to bond and I think it really help us understand our roles in our relationship.  I let him take hold of the map and guide us through.  I would give my opinion, but it was definitely a task for me to just follow him. 😉  The maze was a lot more difficult than we thought because we had the added task of finding 5 different scarecrows along the way.  After about an hour, and much exercise, we found all 5 scarecrows, but only 4 of them had cards to prove it. :/  Corbin was the navigator keeping us on path, and I scoped out the scenery finding the scarecrows along the way.  We made it to the end to get our surprise gift (see below) lol.  I highly recommend taking a random vacation just to season your relationship or spice up your life! #spicegirls

B.O.B. and friend’s funeral

Last weekend started great with me meeting up with a friend back at home and us going to the free concert in Amnesia at Motor City Casino.  The headliner was B.O.B. for the Rising Icons 2 Tour on BET.  We had a fantastic time after a little foolishness of people taking their jobs way too seriously.  Playboy Tre opened up for him and then came back on their track together I Bet I Bust.  It was an ATL dirty road good time with good music!  We danced a little bit more after the performances and walked around the casino floor before heading home.

Saturday was the funeral for my good friend Sanuwell Landrum.  He was a great person that had a passion for educating and preventing HIV.  He was in the process of founding S.O.S Stomping out STDs and had done a few keynote speeches around the city.  There were plenty of tears that day, but we all know that he is in a better place.  The best quote from his service was “Learn like you will live forever, and Live like you will die tomorrow”.  It was an opportunity for a lot of my homies to get together and reconnect.  We all decided that we need to get together more outside of Holidays, Weddings, and Funerals.  From Sam, I learned that you have to leave a legacy here while you can because tomorrow is not always promised.  This was also a factor in me actively pursuing my bIg plan.

Random Link of the Day: Zombies (coincidentally, I picked this link a few days ago for my next post; weird huh?)

Eat Pray Love –my way.

 

The day before leaving Hong Kong, my friend an I exchanged books that we had been reading.  I gave her my Wicked for her Eat Pray Love.  I have yet to read it and don’t even know where it is.  I plan to eventually see the movie too.  Anyway, I’m trying to make some major steps in my life over the next 6-12 months and I figure I have to be the change that I want to see I’m gonna change the game.

When I return from my cruise, I am starting a new eating plan.  It’s geared towards making me a healthier person on the inside.  1. I am going to become more strict with my Portion Control plan by eating amounts closer to the recommended portions.  2. I am going to work more towards being a vegetarian.  I’ve always wanted to try it, but never have.  The plan is to start by allowing myself 1 day per week to eat meat.  If this is too easy, then I’ll cut out the meat altogether.  I started to research the Blood Type Diet again, but I just love too many of the foods that it suggests that I shouldn’t eat.

Next, I’m going to set aside some God time everyday.  My plan involves spending my evenings researching and acting on “my bIg plan” <which hasn’t been announced to most>.  Before and after that research time will involve prayer for guidance and praise for whatever progress was done.  I was considering combining the prayer with my eating into some sort of fast.  Of course it’s not going to be something super intense or anything to make me lose weight.  I will still use many of the principles of fasting, but I compromised and decided the veggie thing was best for me and my lifestyle.  Instead of me continually praying for what I want, it will help to show me God’s will.

Regarding love, I’m taking this step the slowest of all.  I found love with my boyfriend, but we had to work on ourselves separately from each other.  Hopefully, love will find its way back to me and will slither in and align itself with “my bIg plan”.  I have started living the way I want to live and actively attempting to reach and succeed at my goals.  I know all of this will be difficult, but I am excited for the journey.

Quote of the day: “If you always do what you always did, you’ll always get what you always got.”